A grown man minding his own business on the porch learned the hard way that nature does not care about your phone call.
Security footage circulating online shows the guy standing on a covered wooden deck, phone to his ear, looking like he is just wrapping up a casual chat. Then a squirrel comes in like it has a personal vendetta.
The rodent launches onto him, scrambling up his back and locking onto his neck and shoulders while he flails, spins, and tries to shake it off, all without dropping the call. A small brown-and-white dog charges in, barks, circles and generally adds to the chaos instead of ending it.
That panic is understandable. An unprovoked squirrel jumping a person is not normal backyard behavior. Healthy squirrels usually bolt from humans, not treat them like a climbing wall.
The good news, if you can call it that: squirrels almost never carry rabies. CDC data and public-health reviews show the usual U.S. suspects are bats, raccoons, skunks, and foxes. Small rodents like squirrels have been tested by the tens of thousands over the years, and confirmed rabies cases in them are vanishingly rare. There is no documented case of a person in the United States catching rabies from a squirrel.
The bad news: “almost never” is not “never.” Health officials still say any unprovoked wildlife bite or scratch should get a doctor’s look, plus basic wound care and a tetanus check. If the animal was acting bizarre, attacking instead of running, local health departments may still recommend a rabies risk assessment.
Wildlife experts say most squirrel attacks that look this aggressive come down to a few possibilities: a mother defending nearby young, a rodent that has lost its fear of people after being fed, or an animal that is sick or injured. Feeding squirrels is a classic way to turn them from cute park extras into porch terrorists.
Until then, the lesson is simple. If you are on a call outside, watch the trees. The odds of getting jumped by a squirrel are still tiny.
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