ELLICOTT CITY, Md. — Some criminals are just born unlucky. Others are born stupid.
Jalen Godard of Odenton found out the hard way early Thursday morning when he allegedly broke into a Verizon Wireless store, only to have his getaway truck swiped while he was inside ransacking the place.
In a move that would make even the dumbest crook facepalm, the 29-year-old then called 911 to report his own ride stolen.
Howard County police were already on the scene investigating the break-in at the Verizon store in the 9300 block of Baltimore National Pike when Godard phoned in about his missing truck around 5:45 a.m. on June 25.
Officer PFC Buchanan quickly put two and two together after spotting blood on Godard’s hands and eyeglasses.
Surveillance footage shows a man matching Godard’s description inside the store, apparently looting it after shattering the front window. Blood was later found on the broken glass, consistent with cuts on the suspect.
Bodycam video captures the painfully awkward moment officers confronted him.
Godard initially tried to play dumb, claiming he was at a nearby McDonald’s when his truck disappeared and insisting he had nothing to do with the Verizon store.
“I wasn’t at no Verizon store, sir. I promise to God,” he told cops.
The story fell apart fast.
Pressed about the blood and his location, Godard eventually admitted he left the keys in the truck.“That’s some karma right there, dude,” Buchanan can be heard saying on the footage.
Police say the sharp-eyed officer connected the dots in minutes. Godard was handcuffed and arrested on the spot.
The hilarious bodycam and store surveillance footage, released by the Howard County Police Department, has since gone viral, with viewers roasting the would-be thief’s spectacular self-own.
“Don’t you hate it when your car gets stolen while you’re committing a burglary?” the police posted alongside the video. “Great work by PFC Buchanan… Karma, indeed.”
No details have been released yet on what, if anything, Godard actually managed to steal from the store before his ride vanished.
But one thing is crystal clear: This guy won’t be needing another getaway vehicle for a very long time.
